on the chang gang

vicemag:

THE VICE GUIDE TO ADULTHOOD

We are so sick of you full-grown babies running around aimlessly—with your shoes untied and overdraft-fee receipts falling out of your pockets and grease stains on your cut-offs and employment-repellant skillsets and inability to party and go to work the next morning—that we’ve gone ahead and figured it all out for you.

In the early 2000s, 20- and even 30-somethings could eek out a passable existence as abhorrent, unabashedly selfish, microwave-dependent, and wholly unproductive members of society. Today, somewhat due to the grievous irresponsibility’s of our baby boomer parents, we know that such behavior can only heap insurmountable debt being foisted upon future generations, and, if you really give it your all, the slaughter of millions of innocent civilians worldwide and other atrocities.

Chances are your parents were selfish and didn’t raise you correctly. Like, at least one-third of the people reading this have no idea how to fold a T-shirt. What the fuck is wrong with you? Did you just not show up to that day of life? But it’s OK. We will show you the way.

 

CONTINUE

The Hygiene section, I hope and pray, is a given among anyone over the age of 10 but the last couple of sections are spot-on. Seriously, adults, don’t lie and read a damn book.

Also, what the hell are those sesame seed looking things in that dude’s hair?! ACK.

1. these-radiant-shadows likes this
2. lilygoodspeed reblogged this from vicemag and added:

   Oh Vice. Such a ridiculous but spot-on publication.

3. coolisfreedomofexpression reblogged this from vicemag
4. radshades likes this
5. kxvn likes this
6. ryanisawhiteboy reblogged this from vicemag
7. kdirtyla reblogged this from vicemag
8. fallin2pieces likes this
9. fineandandy reblogged this from vicemag
10. thestreetsurferssoundtrack likes this
11. amandafbabyyy reblogged this from godvomit
12. she-breathes-evil likes this
13. yeahicountinfives likes this
14. simmysimmy reblogged this from vicemag
15. craigsjunkdrawer reblogged this from vicemag
16. opiumeyes likes this
17. audreyhorne90 likes this
18. kaoztheory reblogged this from vicemag
19. rub-a-dub reblogged this from vicemag
20. tobia likes this
21. theisleoflindentrees reblogged this from vicemag
22. gradschoolofhardknocks likes this
23. thericht likes this
24. kuddlykittenz reblogged this from vicemag and added:

    Yep.

25. sleeperagent reblogged this from vicemag
26. meechygreen reblogged this from vicemag
27. vivalarevolushun likes this
28. lukehandcool likes this
29. fuckingawesomewade reblogged this from buns-theladybot
30. ohhhkat likes this
31. locomotivephones likes this
32. impossiblecolor likes this
33. buns-theladybot reblogged this from whoopthis
34. satanasredimido reblogged this from vicemag
35. matanuska-thunderfuck likes this
36. linsquaared likes this
37. ana-isabel likes this
38. howinappropriate likes this
39. makemewarmer likes this
40. nutterjack reblogged this from vicemag
41. nutterjack likes this
42. notliketheplant likes this
43. ms-creant reblogged this from vicemag
44. momobertz likes this
45. likesyrup likes this
46. knifekick reblogged this from vicemag
47. harnessthehardpressed likes this
48. tarzanbboy likes this
49. popgoespop reblogged this from vicemag
50. jasminesafaeian likes this
51. Show more notesLoading...